


Hold Back the River

by orphan_account



Series: Hold Back the River [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Galra!Keith, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-15
Updated: 2016-11-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 06:11:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8566996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “I am half Galran,” Keith whispered. He swallowed, forced his eyes open and stared at the floor. “I-I thought it wasn’t true. My mom told me, when I was a kid. But I—she—” His breath came fast, tears streaming down his face. “I didn’t believe her. I didn’t want to!”





	

“Keith, it’s not hard. I say ‘Vol,’ you say…”

Lance looked expectantly at him, but Keith frowned, both confused and entirely _done_ with the conversation. “Vol-tron,” he replied flatly.

“Argh! No!” Lance threw his hands in the air and stood from the lounge seat. “For crying out loud, Keith.” Keith rolled his eyes.

“I think we can come up with a better team cheer, anyway,” Hunk put in.

“You guys can figure it out _after_ training,” Shiro interrupted, standing as well. “Let’s suit up.”

“Aw, Shiro! We’ve only had an hour and fifteen minute break, and Allura said we could have an hour and a _half_!” Lance whined.

“And besides, I’m not done fixing Lance’s helmet,” Pidge added, squinting over her glasses at the wires in Lance’s helmet’s communicator. Lance crossed his arms and indicated the project with a sideways jerk of his head as if to say, _See?_

“Doesn’t mean you can’t train without it,” Keith snapped, standing.

“Ex- _cuuuse_ me, but I’m not about to risk getting this beautiful mug damaged by your bad swordsmanship, Keith,” Lance replied, gesturing towards his own face.

“What? When have I _ever_ hit you in the face?”

“Uh, like, _yesterday?_ You punched me right here.” He pointed to his cheekbone. “It still hurts.”

Keith crossed his arms. “ _That_ was deliberate,” he smirked. “I struck exactly where I wanted to.”

Lance scowled. “You’re such a jerk!”

“Oh really? In a _real_ fight, anything goes. Are you saying you’re not ready for that?”

Lance’s jaw dropped. “Do you hear him?” he demanded of the room.

“Enough, both of you,” Shiro ordered.

“Shiro, can we _please_ have the rest of our break?” Hunk pleaded. “I’m still digesting breakfast!”

Shiro looked to be about to say something when Allura’s voice rang over the loudspeaker. “You might want to hold off on starting your training for a little while longer. Coran discovered a secret weapon mentioned in the castle’s database yesterday, and we’ve just now unlocked it. We’re going to see if it works.”

“Cool!” Pidge exclaimed, looking up from Lance’s helmet.

“What is it, another cannon?” Hunk asked.

“No, actually,” Allura replied. “It’s a high-frequency sound generator specifically designed to incapacitate the Galra.”

At the word ‘Galra,’ Keith’s stomach clenched. The worry of the past few weeks came surging back, sending a million anxious thoughts cascading out of the mental box he’d stuffed them in last night. “How does it work?” he forced himself to ask.

“Quite simply, actually.” Coran spoke now. “The Galra can hear higher frequencies than humans and Alteans. The weapon emits a noise too high for us to hear, but it’s pitched just so and backed with a lot of power.”

“So, like an outer-space dog whistle?” Lance asked. “What does it do, make them sit and wait for a treat?” Pidge giggled.

“Actually, the records merely say ‘incapacitation.’” Coran replied. “However, it later says ‘incapacitation of an entire Galra fleet,’ so it’s definitely worth seeing if we can get it to work.”

“The weapon is designed to broadcast over any and all communications frequencies the castle is tuned to, interior and exterior,” Allura continued. So we want you to keep your helmets off, just in case it isn’t quite working. It _may_ be out of tune. We have a frequency meter up here to measure it.”

“Wouldn’t want you all to have to listen to feedback noise right in your ear,” Coran said.

“Yeah, but it’ll still broadcast over the channel we’re talking on,” Hunk pointed out.

“Can’t really help that,” Coran replied. “The weapon automatically overrides all channels, keeping them open as long as it’s firing. At least if it malfunctions, it won’t be _right_ in your ear. And anyway, we’re going to test the frequency _before_ we amp up the power. Ten to one you won’t hear a thing.”

 “It’ll take about twenty minutes to power the weapon up and test it,” Allura said. “Possibly less.”

 “Sounds good.” Shiro said, sitting on the rounded sofa.

 Keith sighed and sat next to him on the end. He drummed his fingers on his crossed arms, resisting the urge to plug his ears. He dearly wished for his noise-cancelling headphones, but they were under his bunk, two decks below them. “This is like staring at the toaster, waiting for the bread to pop up,” he remarked dryly.

Shiro laughed. “I’m sure they’ll turn it off if it’s making a weird noise. They’ll be able to hear it, too.”

Except that wasn’t quite what Keith meant.

His mother had told him, when he’d been seven and she’d been an hour before death, to _never tell them you’re half Galran. They’ll capture you, torture you, and then kill you slowly. Be careful, Keith. Don’t trust_ anyone _with this secret. Do you understand?_

No, he hadn’t understood, but he’d nodded through his tears and held his mother’s hand until it went cold and stiff. He knew he’d always been a little different _._ Stuff he couldn’t explain, like being able to hear the internal workings of his digital watch if he held it to his ear. Or falling thirty feet from a tree at age five and landing on his feet, unharmed. But he’d shrugged it off. Everyone was different. He was just a little _more_ different. That was all. For twelve years he dismissed his mother’s words and convinced himself he’d either misheard her or she’d been delirious in her last hours.  As far as he was concerned, as far as he _cared,_ he was human, one hundred percent.

He couldn’t be Galran. He _loathed_ the monstrous alien beings. They’d almost killed Lance, and he’d wanted to _strangle_ Sendak. His heart pounded and his hands trembled to hit something when he remembered how the flashbacks used to—still did, sometimes—make Shiro freeze in terror during training or a fight. Keith relished in each and every victory against the Galra, and trained hard so that he could defeat them again and again.

And then he’d gone and opened the Galran door with his _own hand_.

 _Shiro trusts me. And he’s spent so much time with the Galra that, if I_ was _a Galra, he’d be able to figure it out. So I’m not a Galra. And this weapons test is gonna prove it._

“Here you go, Lance!” Pidge announced, tossing Lance his repaired helmet.

“Sweet! Thanks, Pidge!” Lance grinned.

“Don’t put your helmet on,” Shiro reminded him.

Lance froze with the helmet just above his head. “Right.”

 _POP_ went all the speakers, and the five Paladins flinched. Lance dropped his helmet, and Shiro caught it before it rolled past the edge of the couch.

“Sorry!” came Coran’s voice. “We just turned the weapon on, is all. It needs a few more ticks to charge.”

Keith fixed his eyes on his boots. _The door thing was just a glitch in the circuitry_ , he thought. _And I_ don’t _fight like a Galra, the Galra fight like_ me.

There was still the unexplainable dagger in Keith’s room, the one with the weird design he’d covered in wraps because he didn’t like it, but kept because it was the only thing he had from his mom. _Coincidence. Or some kind or space debris._ Keith’s stomach unknotted ever so slightly. _I am NOT a Galra._

A small, high pitched keen sounded over the speakers, like how his ears rang after an explosion. Keith glanced at the other Paladins. They all laughed at something Hunk said, heedless of the noise.

“Right, it’s turned on, and it appears to be at the right frequency,” Coran announced. “We’ll be amping up the power in just a tick…”

The Paladins went silent.

“Copy that, we can’t hear a thing,” Pidge replied after a second, and Lance started talking again.

Keith’s chest tightened, and he sat up. _That can’t be right._ His mouth opened, about to ask Pidge if she was sure, about to tell Lance to _shush, listen for a sec, how can you guys not hear that—_

The tiny keen exploded into a piercing, stabbing shriek.

Keith screamed, his throat immediately going raw and burning. He clenched his head with both hands, eyes shut. The sound speared into his skull, slicing daggers into his eardrums and ripping into his brain. It pulsed through his body, pounding against his heartbeat; his vision went to throbbing, blinding white light. His head spun, his stomach lurched, and he fell off the couch onto the floor. Pain shot down his spine and into his limbs, and his skin burned and his eyes _ached_. The world became white pounding light and a stabbing knife of sound and he could not stop screaming.

“ _Turn it off!”_

_“It is off!”_

And it was off. The noise disappeared, leaving Keith’s body aching to the bones. His head throbbed with each beat of his heart, as if charging up and about to explode. He gasped for air, whimpering, feeling hot tears escape his tightly shut eyes and trickle down his cheeks. His hands dropped from his head to the cool metal floor. Instantly goose bumps prickled on his arms, and he shivered.

“Keith?” came a small, high-pitched voice, and he flinched. The bony part of his left elbow ached where it had smashed into the floor, and his belt dug into his hip. He pushed against the floor, trying to get up, but fell back with a feeble groan.

_“What are you?!”_

_What?_

_“Hunk, Lance, stand down! Now!”_

_Oh no._

Keith opened his eyes and stared at his hand.

His _purple_ hand.

_No, no, no, please, no…_

He heard the doors open, heard Allura shriek.

Keith shoved himself to a sitting position and grabbed Lance’s helmet. His head spun and his stomach knotted, but he forced his shaking hand to close the visor. His eyes burned and watered _;_ somehow it’d gotten far too bright in the room. He turned the helmet over and squinted down at his reflection.

A purple face with pupilless, gleaming yellow eyes stared back at him.

“ _NO!!”_ Keith screamed, hurling the helmet across the room and staggering to his feet. The Paladins, Allura, and Coran all stared at him. Hunk gripped a practice bo staff, glaring at Keith. Lance stood poised, looking torn between attacking and fleeing. Keith backed up, looking quickly away from Pidge’s wide, shocked eyes to Coran’s narrow, angry stare. He swallowed, glanced at Allura’s round eyes, her hand over her mouth, to Shiro. Shiro stood with one hand out, stopping Hunk. But he stood rooted in place, trembling with wide eyes, in a way that could only be caused by one thing.

_I am a Galra._

Keith bumped into the wall and flinched. The room lurched again, and he braced a hand on the wall behind him.

_I am Shiro’s nightmares. I am one of the creatures that torments him day and night. I am one of the monsters who almost murdered Lance._

Keith’s breath hitched. His hand slipped on the wall and he staggered, almost falling.

“Keith?” Lance said, his voice tight, uncertain, and…

_Scared._

_They think I’m a double-agent._

“I-I’m not—” Keith coughed; it hurt to talk, it hurt to _breathe_. And he trembled with cold, and he still couldn’t get his eyes to open wider than a squint.

“Keith, what is this?” Allura asked, her voice shaking.

Keith shut his eyes and shook his head. “I am half Galran,” he whispered. He swallowed, forced his eyes open and stared at the floor. “I-I thought it wasn’t true. My mom told me, when I was a kid. But I—she—” His breath came fast, tears streaming down his face. “I didn’t believe her. I didn’t want to!”

Shiro lowered his hand and took one step forward, his eyes hard and unreadable.

_And they don’t believe me._

“I thought it wasn’t true. I thought I was just d-different…” Keith looked to Shiro’s metal right hand and choked back a sob. Despite his squint, he thought he could see a faint purple glow.

_It’s too late. They’ll never believe me._

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I should have told you sooner, I’m _sorry,_ Shiro, Allura—” His breath shuddered and he clamped a hand over his mouth, muffling his crying. Shiro continued to approach. Keith yanked his dagger, his only weapon, from the sheath on his back and flung it to the side. He tried to raise his hands in surrender, but the motion dizzied him and he snapped his hand back to the wall. He  took a deep breath. “I know… that you think… I’m a spy.” He swallowed, Shiro now only two steps away.

_They’ll capture you, torture you, and then kill you slowly. Do you understand?_

He did now.

“I am the most hated being in the universe, and you have no reason to believe me. If you’re going to kill me, p-please just do it fast.” His voice broke on the last word and he shut his eyes.

“Oh, Keith…” Pidge breathed.

“Keith.” Shiro stood directly in front of him.

Keith cringed away from his voice. “ _I’m s-so sorry, Shiro!”_ he choked. He heard Shiro raise his metal hand. Keith flinched and gritted his teeth.

But Shiro’s left hand rested on his shoulder, and his right gently tilted Keith’s head up towards him.

“Look at me, Keith.”

Keith sobbed, a dry, strangled gasp, and forced his eyes open to the last face he’d ever see.

“No one is going to hurt you, Keith. _No one._ ” Shiro’s hand fell to Keith’s left shoulder, and Keith blinked. Shiro’s soft brown eyes held no fear. Instead they held sympathy, the same sympathy he’d seen when Pidge lost Rover, or when Hunk got so motion-sick he couldn’t focus, or when Lance had been so tired after emerging from the healing pod he hadn’t been able to stand on his own.

Keith ducked his head. Tears dripped down his face and a loud, shaky gasp tore out of his throat. Shiro moved forward and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. Keith’s arms went limp at his sides. He pressed his forehead against Shiro’s shoulder, his chest heaving with loud sobs.

“It’s okay,” Shiro murmured, gently resting his hand on the back of Keith’s head. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

“It’s all right, Keith,” Lance said, sounding near tears himself.

“We’re not gonna hurt you, you’re safe,” Pidge murmured. Allura, Coran, and Hunk echoed the soothing words, all crowding around him. Keith hid further in Shiro’s embrace, shrinking away from them. Shiro’s arms warmed him only a little, and he shuddered and cried harder.

“You are _not_ the most hated being in the universe,” Shiro said. “It doesn’t matter what species you are. It doesn’t matter what you look like. What matters is _who_ you are.” His arms tightened around Keith. “You are Keith Kogane. You are a fighter, and you care deeply about your team. You _earned_ the respect of the Red Lion, and you are a Paladin of Voltron. And you are a part of this family, and you are loved very much. No matter what _._ ” He paused. “Do you understand?” he asked gently. “ _No matter what_ , we will _always_ love you.”

Keith clung to Shiro’s jacket then, the leather chilling his forearms. He clung to his words as well, running them over and over in his mind. He didn’t understand. He didn’t understand how other people could say they loved him when he _hated_ himself so much.

“Everything will be all right, Keith,” Allura said gently.

“Shiro’s right, Keith,” Hunk added. “I’m sorry I freaked out. I still love you.”

Keith gulped and gritted his teeth. His crying turned to uncontrollable, shuddering gasps.

“Breathe, buddy,” Shiro murmured.

After a long moment, Keith finally felt the warmth emanating from Shiro, and his violent shivering lessened. He drew a deep, steady breath. And another, and another.

“There you go,” Shiro said. Keith pulled back and rubbed his eyes, keeping his gaze fixed on the floor.

“Interesting,” Coran remarked.

“What?” Keith asked, daring a glance at him.

But Coran no longer glared at him. “Look at your arm,” he said gently.

Keith did so, and froze. The purple skin faded to familiar pink within seconds, and with it the throbbing behind his eyes. “How did… I didn’t do that on purpose…”

“It’s a common phenomenon with children of two different species,” Coran explained. “Typically the child will have the appearance of just one of the species, with only some small indications that they do in fact have the genes for the other species as well.”

 _The Galra door._ Keith swallowed. “But…what just happened?” he asked in a small voice.

“Over time, the genes for the other species can become more active,” Allura said. “This happens in many different species: sometimes a person’s hair color will change as they get older, for example. In cases like yours, the increase in activity is usually just linked to the sympathetic nervous system. But over time, the genetic activity responds to more than just a fight-or-flight situation. Eventually, any stimuli will trigger it.”

“Are you saying he’s just going to randomly turn into a Galra?” Lance asked.

“Simply speaking, yes,” Allura said softly, and Keith winced.

 _I can’t train with Shiro ever again. If I changed while we’re sparring…_ He gulped and shuddered a little. “Will it ever stop?” he asked.

 _“_ Yes… eventually the Galran genes inside you will stabilize, _”_ Allura replied.

“But will I be Galran or human?” Keith demanded.

“You are both, and you will always be both.” she said. “But…it is likely that your Galran genes will stay active. You will likely end up with the appearance of a Galra.”

“This might help you become a better Paladin,” Coran offered. “You might have other Galra genes beyond appearance. The Galra have enhanced sensitivity to temperature, light, and noise—”

“I know,” Keith snapped. “I’ve always had that. It’s really annoying.” He swallowed. “It got worse just now. I could barely _see_. I can’t just…I can’t just have that randomly happen during a _fight!_ ” He ran a shaking hand through his hair, his hand brushing one of his naturally pointed ears, _there’s another stupid trait…_

“Keith,” Shiro said, and Keith looked up at him. “Don’t be scared. You don’t have to face this alone.”

“I can’t be a liability to this team, Shiro,” Keith replied miserably.

“You’re not. And you never will be a liability. We’re going to help you get through this. Whatever we have to do to help you, we’ll do it.”

The rest of the team eagerly voiced their agreement. Pidge started explaining how she could modify the training deck, to make it adapt automatically if Keith changed during practice. Hunk and Coran quickly offered to help her out. The team chattered all around Keith, running possible solutions to every conceivable problem past each other with as much enthusiasm as when they’d go on a mission.

Keith ducked his head and pressed a fist to his mouth. He squeezed his eyes shut against fresh tears. He felt Lance put an arm around his shoulders, and he nearly lost it all over again.

They still cared, he realized. Not about the huge problem of having a half-Galran on board, but about _him._ Because like Shiro said: they were family. And that’s what families did.

“We’re here for you, Keith,” Shiro said. “You will not face this alone. Okay?”

Keith opened his eyes and took a steadying breath. “Okay,” he whispered.


End file.
